Thank You & You’re Welcome

They’re small phrases that sit front of mind for me often these days.

You see, I’ve been doing some work in customer service recently and I’ve become aware that there is a large number of people out there who think that if they thrown a tantrum, make threats to leave or not recommend someone that they’ll get what they want. They’ll be pandered to and be showered with gifts for their efforts. But why should we reward this behaviour?

I’ve seen the opposite side too. The people whose experiences were beyond comprehension and yet they remain calm and measured and understand that sometimes, these things happen. They don’t expect anything in return and they are grateful for the assistance we can provide.

I’ve seen how customer service representatives on the front line, in-person and over the phone do all that they can to help, only to be met with attitudes of expectation and “You owe me” language.

What we forget sometimes, if we’re having a bad day, or we’re just grumpy that they may well be genuinely trying to help. They may be adhering as best they can to the policies they are meant to stick to while bending over backwards trying to get the best outcome and we lash out. How does that help anyone? If we lash out, we get angry and fuel our own anger which doesn’t make us feel better, it makes us feel worse.

The same goes the other way around too.

I’m not saying you should just accept poor service, not at all. But be clear about what is reasonable and what is not. Be clear when it’s really the company’s fault or their their third party’s fault. Be clear that it may not be the fault of the person in front of you, on the line or in chat – they did not necessarily personally cause the issues you experienced so why hold them personally responsible?

Expressing your frustration need not be an excuse to treat someone badly or to not acknowledge their assistance in any way, shape or form. In fact, it can be easy to express it with dignity for both yourself and the person assisting you.

The point is to remember that we’re all human. So simple manners like please, thank you and you’re welcome should be staples in our vocabulary. We definitely should not be rewarding inappropriate behaviour from fellow humans. We should be treating one another with respect and we should be using our manners. And our reward for that should be our own sense that we have done good in the world by treating people as human beings.

Here’s a simple rule: If you want good service, use good manners.

 

 

 

Human Too: The Never Ending Onion

Never Ending Onion Human Too

I often have clients come in and when they explain what’s going on, I know instinctively what they need in terms of a goal to work with in their Kinesiology session. They often wonder how I am so wise to know exactly what they need and how I know so much about everything their body is going through.

Here’s how I know. I’m human too.

Yes, I’ve done lots of work on myself and it may appear like I’ve got it all together but I still find myself working on old issues that I feel like I’ve been working on forever. It’s like I work on one level then the next priority level shows up for me to look at.

Often, and you’ll hear this from so many people, what ever it is that you struggle with or that you need to heal in yourself is often the very thing you can help people with yourself.

I can’t help people with boundaries for instance if I’m not constantly working through my own boundary issues. I can’t help people with self-confidence or money or presentation skills or starting their own business if I myself have not and are not continually working on these aspects myself. Would you take lessons in guitar for instance from someone who was just a natural and never really had to work at it? Do you think they’d fully comprehend what it takes to learn to read the sheet music? or the frustration that comes when you feel like you’re no good at it and you might as well throw in the towel now? or the elation that comes when you finally get that tune down without having to think about it so intently?

It’s human to be working through something on some level at any given point in time. Your practitioners know what you need because they have the answers, yes. And they have the answers because they’ve been there before. They’re human too.

 

Monday Mantra:: It’s Safe for Me To Be Human

Monday-Mantra-being-human

 

Children have this knack of being themselves. When they’re happy, they are outwardly happy and joyous. When they’re sad, they cry. Somewhere between childhood and adulthood though, we’re taught to pretend that we’re okay, even if we’re not. We’re taught to be calm even when we’re happy.

Often as adults, we find ourselves in not so great circumstances and we push through, pretending that we’re fine when we’re not and thinking that we have to hold ourselves together that we can’t be unwell or we can’t be upset because people will think less of us. We go to work when we’re sick even though we know it’s important to look after ourselves, we get it in our mind that a business is more important, that something or someone outside ourselves is more important than us and our own wellbeing?!

The fact is that being vulnerable is actually okay. News flash: we’re all human. We’re not perfect because it’s in our nature to always be striving for more, so why deny ourselves of who we really are, our authentic selves? We’re all human. We laugh, we cry and sometimes we get sick and you know what, we don’t need to pretend we’re okay if we’re not, we can cry if we feel so inclined and we can certainly ask for help.

I hear this so often from clients:

“Is it silly that I feel scared to speak up?”
“Is it vain to want to look good?”
“Is it weird that I’m worried about what other people think?”

The lists go on but my answer is always the same – “No it’s not – you’re human, just like every other person on the planet so you’re not alone in this.”

Today, I want you to acknowledge your humanity and the humanity of those around you. Keep an eye out for those who seem to be keeping themselves, their true self at bay and encourage them to be themselves – lead by example.

 

As always, download and save to your desktop or phone or print it and pin it somewhere you’ll see it. When you see it, say it. And if you know someone who would also benefit from this mantra, share it.

 

 

 

Monday Mantra:: I hold the key

Monday-Mantra-I-hold-the-key-kinesiologyI cashed in on my Christmas present from my lovely man last night.

Bubbles & Buble!

We even had a yummy dinner out after our pre-dinner drinks. It was great to be out on a date after almost 12 years together. When we got into the venue, there was of course the merchandise stands. I had been looking for a key ring over the last week so when I saw a Michael Buble key ring, it was sold the second I laid eyes on it.

What occurred to me throughout the evening though was that there was much more to this key ring for me.

A reminder of a lovely evening with my man
Because we get caught up in everyday life, day after day, we sometimes forget to appreciate the time we have together, just the two of us. We have the key to this and that is simply to appreciate the time spent together. Wether that’s over dinner and Michael Buble or over coffee and piece of raisin toast (our recent favourite thing to do in this Melbourne weather). Every moment counts so we choose to appreciate it. Appreciation or gratitude is the key.

Dreams come true
Mr. Buble always mentions how lucky he is to have his dream come true. It’s even more evident now with wife and son and he makes no secret of that. It’s a beautiful thing. Set aside the fact that the world knows who he is, ultimately, he’s a person just like you and I who gets to live his dream doing what he loves with the support of the people he loves. Now, that’s the key – find something you love and people who love and support you and you’ve got the keys to success, regardless of what scale your dream is.

I can help make dreams come
Now, this one is pretty cool too. Yes, it’s easier when you’ve got money or the world supporting you in this endeavour but there is always an opportunity to make dreams come true for others. Last night, Michael Buble took the opportunity to share his time with two young fans. He didn’t have to, but he chose to. The key here is to see the opportunities as they arise and take them on. Even if it’s just to emotionally support someone else while they chase their dreams – that’s a huge key to your success and theirs, because if their dreams come true, it reinforces the idea, the belief that your dreams can come true too.

I don’t intend to be cheesy with this one but this is the number one key:

“Keep on loving what is true and the world will come to you – you can find it in yourself.”

You hold the key to your happiness. Find them and then use them.

 

As always, save this image to your phone or desktop or print it out and pin it somewhere. When you see it, say it. And if you think someone you know could use this mantra right now, share it. (You could hold the key to their happiness today).

 

I Hold The Keys