Monday Mantra:: I Seek Counsel

Monday Mantra I seek counsel

 

Holding it all in may feel like you’re protecting those you love. You may feel like it’s silly to feel the way you feel or that somehow, they’ll judge you or perhaps they’ll react in a way that will make you feel worse, not better.

But holding on to thoughts and feelings means that eventually our tank gets full. It will either overflow, explode or even worse – implode.

Anxiety and Depression (especially depression) can be overwhelming. It can be feel like a bottomless pit and it can feel like a lonely experience. Yes, it’s also difficult to speak up about it too.

Here’s the thing. If you speak up, seek counsel on your thoughts, your fears and emotional space, then you have more opportunity to work your way out and back into the lighter side of life again. It won’t necessarily be easy but ultimately it’s worth it. Even the greatest warrior needs men at his side in order to do battle. So call on your people and ask them to stand with you, to walk by your side into the battle.

Thankfully, for me, I’ve only seen this from a step or two back from those effected by someone with depression. What I’ve noticed from my time as a Kinesiologist is that the thing that keeps us from a asking for help is the fear of “what will others think” or “I shouldn’t really feel this way” or “it’s selfish for me to feel this way when other people are struggling with real difficulties”. The difficulty you feel about your world is real to you. And that is real enough to seek counsel. You are entitled to feel the way you do and just because it may seem like other people have it harder than you, doesn’t mean you are any less worthy of support.

Seek counsel. Please.

Advice on how to have the conversation and who to seek counsel: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/have-the-conversation

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Note: This Monday Mantra is written specifically about Anxiety and Depression however, seeking counsel can be a big game changer regardless of your situation. Keep in mind too if you ever find yourself on the end of a conversation where someone you love is seeking your counsel, to remain in listening mode and offer your support where you can and know that how they are feeling is not a reflection on you personally but simply, how they feel.
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As always, download and save to your desktop or phone or print it and pin it somewhere you’ll see it. When you see it, say it. And if you know someone who would also benefit from this mantra, share it.

Use Your Commute: 3 ways to switch off at the end of your work day

I am a Kinesiologist and as a Kinesiologist, I see a lot of clients for anxiety concerns. I would say that at least 80% of these clients are also unhappy in their current job, which contributes to their anxiety and they tend to find it less than easy to “switch off” at the end of the work day.

My clients often cite getting home and “downloading” on their partner or housemate and often feeling worse for it, getting themselves wound up and unintentionally taking it out those they love. Sometimes, it leads to a microscope effect where that negative talk about work builds up a case for everything that is not running so smoothly at home. This clouds our judgment allowing our discord with our working life to put a microscope on home issues that really don’t require such intense interrogation. Things tend to snowball from there.

So, here’s three ways I often share with my clients of disconnecting from your work day and transitioning into your home time. I have personally used each of these before and found them very beneficial:

1: Visual Disconnect
Work in a building where there are automatic sliding doors? Imagine when you get up from your desk, that you have a cord or rope tied around your waist that is also tied to your desk. As you cross the threshold of your building and step outside, imagine that the sliding doors are sharp and actually cut the cord that binds you to your desk.

If your work building doesn’t have one of these, use the same visualization with a standard handled door, the spinning doors or even the doors from the elevator. Find a way to create a visualized disconnect.

2: Use your commute to transition
If you catch a train, tram or bus from work, use your commute to transition out of work time and into home time. Close your eyes and as you breathe in, imagine breathing in calm, clear, fresh air and then as you breathe out, imagine breathing out all the stress of your work day.

Which way do you like to sit on the train? Facing forwards or backwards? Try this tactic: On the way into work, face where you’re going (work). It helps to get your mind transitioning into work time. BUT when you’re on your way home, try facing away from where you’re going (work). I like to do this because it helps me to visually leave it behind. If sitting facing backwards is not so easy on your body, then use the travel home to focus on all the happy things that are awaiting you when you arrive home.

3: Limit the Vent
When you get home, limit your vent. Choose three stressful issues to talk about or limit your self to five minutes of venting. Then, finish off the conversation with 3 good things that happened today. For example: you were up to the free coffee on your coffee card today, someone offered you their seat on the train or your boss said “thank you for your help” at the end of the day.

This works because you get to get the frustration out which is key to reducing stress and eliminating it out of the body and it re-enforces the positive. This teaches you to also look at the positive items and allow these to snowball instead.

Give these three tips a try and please feel free to alter them as required – it has to work for you.

 

Stress Management

some easy tips to manage stress

some easy tips to manage stress… Click on the image to read the full article.How do you manage stress? I see clients all the time coming in with anxiety and stress and it’s amazing how little people know and understand about stress and what it does to your body. Find out more in the article by clicking on the image to see a larger, readable version.

Relax and enjoy.